something to erase

19th July 2008
“Kenapa aku mendapat ujian seberat ini??”“Allah tidak membebani seseorang itu melainkan sesuai dengan kesanggupannnya”-al-Baqarah:286

1.20am.
I was watching some Korean dramas in the middle of the night. While waiting for the video to buffering, my mind came across about something-if there was anything on youtube about my school-seseri. and so, I typed on the search- “seseri”. and surprisingly, there were a lot of them.One of them was made by my ex-batch mate. She was in the top-ranking class though. Its easy to say that she was excellent in everything, including sports and extra curriculum. The other videos were majority from the juniors, appreciating their life in Seseri as well.Well, I was wondering, why didn’t I have those feeling?-the feeling of fondness towards the school. To be honest, my school time, especially during the upper form in Seseri, I wasn’t really having a good-sweet time there. It was one of the worst memories I have ever had. And indirectly affected my study and my spm result. That’s why I had some regret ness about deciding to continue my study in Seseri one time ago, while I left my favourite school in Bangi. If only time can be turned back to the past. But it wont.Anyhow, I must not think this way towards the school. But I cant help it.Now that I already entering the college I felt relief that my school time is over. While most of the people say that their ‘school-hood’ were the greatest time ever-and I did not. I am so happy that I feel so ease-and-happy during college time. Yeay! I am grateful for what I have today.I went to bed afterward because it was 2 in the morning. It was kind of funny to say that I even had a dream about my school. In the dream, everything was turn out to be different from the reality. Well, I guess that’s why it has been called ‘dream’.
Ha~ having a laptop in the room its quite convenient, although the internet streaming is slightly slow sometimes because almost each of the room in the house having laptop. Haha. Sometimes we even named it as cyber café.“Sesungguhnya manusia yang merancang, Allah yang menentukan”…